This was the scene last Friday night. Reed had been gone all week and I was exhauseted so I'd headed to my parents' house for a little respite and company (and satellite TV!). We had finished a wonderful dinner and it was time to get Evy's bath. I had asked her a few times already to get ready for her bath and get undressed, but in my tired state had yet to make a move to actually prepare myself for the task or to enforce what I'd said. When I finally did drag myself up I nicely, though firmly, asked Evyn once more to get her clothes off. This is the response I received: "Nooooo," as she ran and crashed into the couch, "Shut up!"
It was like a bomb had gone off and no one knew what to do first. Evy froze and looked at me: "Wonder what it does when I say that!" she seemed to be thinking. My dad gasped a little, though he tried to check himself. I'm sure my eyes widened, I glanced at my dad as if to say, "Can you believe that?", then as I heard all the "good" parenting books in my head saying: don't make a big deal of this, I calmly took Evy out of the room to the hallway, so she wouldn't feel the need to perform, or be ashamed. We had a good talk, I explained what she had said and why it was very wrong. She apologized, promised to never say it again, and we hugged and kissed.
However, she has been on a streak lately of at-tit-tude! This little three year old has skipped about 10 years on us! All I have known to do to react is to give her time out every time. Though neither of us may be able to articulate why it's disrespectful, she knows just as well as I do that it just is! So, there's been some time out happenin' up in here lately!
Anybody have other effective solutions for the toddler turned teen overnight? Geesh!!
I've said it once, I'll say it again...I sure am glad you are going through all this first! But...uh...sorry 'bout all the time outs! :(
ReplyDeletei can't believe she said that!
ReplyDeleteI feel your pain girlie, you're not alone! Time outs are our main mode of correction too for both our little girls (mostly our big girl of course). For us, time outs seem to speak loudly for a little social butterfly who craves being around people.
ReplyDeleteHowever, we do give what we call "pow-pows" as well (hand swats for Ellie). We typically reserve the latter for the more serious offenses i.e. physically hurting others, danger to themselves (like running into the street) or out right defiance and disrespect. Especially, if the offense is repeated after receiving the warning.
I also picked up some neat tips and creative ideas on discipline from "Creative Correction" by Lisa Whelchel. She addresses everything from disrespect, manners, lying, whining, leaving a mess, etc... all while incorporating scripture and getting at heart matters.
If you don't have the book yet, I highly recommend it! It's been a big help to me as we tread through these unfamiliar and tough waters for the first time!
I would love to do a study with some other moms specifically on this book. I recently picked up her study guide as well in hopes of going through it with some other ladies.
Hope this offers some encouragement!
maybe i'm a mean mom, if this was one of my two I'd have but one word for ya.....
ReplyDeletepaddle