Beginning Lessons on Honesty

Well, MaryEvyn learned what I hope will be her first and last lesson in...stealing. Yup, she may be adorable and cute, but she also apparently has sticky fingers!
We were at the school's book fair and I bought a couple of books. We were the last ones and the back doors which we went out, lock after you exit. I was buckling Evy into her car seat and she produces out of her little apron pocket a funny bendable pencil.
"Look, Mama!" she said excitedly, "Isn't this a funny pen?"
"MaryEvyn!" I exclaim, "Where did you get that?" Knowing full well the only place I saw one!
Evy, now sheepishly, beginning to think something is wrong, "...from the little table..."
Me, calming down, realizing that she doesn't really know what she's done and that this is an extremely important "teachable moment": "Evy, did Mommy pay for that?"
"...no..."
"Okay, so if we didn't pay for it, then you took it and that is called stealing." I decided that she needed to know the word, know what it meant and feel the "weight" of it, if you will.
"...oh..."
Well, we couldn't easily go back in, so we kept it until today. This morning she dutifully returned it and apologized. She has also told quite a few people about her "stolen pen".
We had been reading lately about the ten commandments and it was actually kinda neat (in a bad sort of way...) to have an immediate object lesson for her personally. I pray that she will really begin to relate to "God's Special Rules" and learn what it means to live as God intends.

Enjoying Round Top Vicariously!

Okay, I just CANNOT be left out of this any more!
So, even though I did not go to Round Top this year...you just have to see these wonderful pictures of it! (And if you don't know what I'm talking about just go here, or here first.)
My friends have done a great job describing their experiences this fall...so you can check out Round Top posts from Steph, Morgan, and Casey. But I found one that gives a great overall revue of the show here, at Cote de Texas. So, if you missed it or don't know what you're missing, head on over to Jodi's blog and check out what she found! Yummy!!!!!

What did I think I'd be?

I was asked to be a room mother. And it's official...I went to a "Room Mother's Meeting" and everything. I think I should have a badge. But it's got me thinking.

When Evy's teacher first asked me I kinda laughed. "Really? Me?" I just never saw myself as the stay at home, cookie bakin', costume sewin', Bible study leadin', room mother kind of gal. Yet here I am. Doing all of those things!

Don't get me wrong. I'm happy to do it. I mean, now that I'm doing it, there isn't anything I don't like about it. Quite the contrary. I love bringing happiness and love to people just by baking cookies (half of which I consume). I love being able to stitch up pillows or a bag, fix a costume for a friend, or make a duvet cover for my daughter.

Here's the thing. When I look at my life now, it's just not what I thought it would be. And what's funnier is that I don't think I could tell you what I did think it would be. But I know that when I found myself in a meeting for room moms, I felt weird. Like, how did I get here?

I always wanted to teach. I really love teaching. I do. I probably will not be able to stay away from it for long once we feel God wants me to work again. I feel that teaching is my spiritual gift, as well, which is one reason why I love student ministry. So, when I thought about my "future" when I was a high schooler, I don't think I went much past teach elementary school and get married. From there, I don't think I ever thought what I would do or be.

It could be that it's rather foreign to me because growing up my mom always worked. The "stay-at-home" moms that I knew were rich and their kids came home and had milk and cookies while they watched one TV show, then they sat at the kitchen table and did they're homework while Mom made dinner. Those kinds of moms.

I just didn't think it would be me. That I would want that normalcy and ooey-gooey sweetness.

But, honestly, as I live this life that God's given me, there is not one thing I would change. It's just weird to be the "adult" Erin now. The "Mommy" Erin. "Wife" Erin wasn't so strange, but this new thirty somethin', suburban livin', Outlander drivin', boo-boo kissin', room mom is a new league. It's a good one and I've got great company here. And I see God's amazing miracles and grace every day.
So where are you? Haven't the boundary lines fallen for you in pleasant places; surely we have a delightful inheritance! (Psalm 16:6)

Gratitude

So, I, too, saw this post on fellow blogger/friend Jessica's blog and thought (along with Casey) that I would take her up on her challenge to list some simple things I am thankful for at this very moment. I also thought that since we are called to be thankful in all things, that I would include a few things I am not usually thankful for, but I will find a reason to be thankful for them now. (Ummm...what?) Like this...
I am thankful for:
* the pile of shoes by the door : my family is all at home and resting and comfy
* the laundry waiting to be folded : I have plenty of clean clothes for me and my family
* it's quiet : Evy is sleeping peacefully in her room, resting for more fun to be had, a quietly ticking clock
* soft light : the glowing lamp on my desk, the setting sun, a lazy fan overhead
* furry friends : a squirrel (one of many) jumps nervously along the yard looking for....who knows?
* neighbors : the promise to help get rid of bagworms (poor pecan tree!), dinner when Reed's gone, a mission field
* this computer : gateway to a bigger world (do I overstate?)
* youth ministry : hard but fulfilling
* football : the game starts in less than one hour - gig 'em Ags!!

For that last reason, I must bid adieu (and Evy is up, so that quiet one is out the window, too!). This has been fun, you should try it!

The Company Picnic

Well, I finally got Reed to take us to his company picnic. He's an engineer (that's the short answer). So we were chatting with MIT grads, a whole bunch o' Aggies (my personal faves) and one lone t-sip (one who attends that other Texas school). Anywho (I hate that word!), Reed just seems to have such a hard time mixing his work people with his personal, family people. He always acts so weird! He says it's just an odd melding of worlds. I think it's a good thing. (He probably does to, it just doesn't come naturally.) The picnic was so near to us this year and he had no real excuse so I pretty much made him get tickets.

We had a good time. I met a few new people and heard a couple of new stories, there wasn't a lot of computer, geeky talk that I don't get. In fact, we mostly hung out with other parents of kiddos Evy's age and she had a fantastic time. It wasn't too hot (it was cloudy and humid, though) and there was a lot to do!

Lunch - first things first!

On the tire swing with a new friend!

A pony ride! (not her first, but cute nevertheless!)

Evy also had a cherry sno-cone, popcorn, a petting zoo, a ring toss game (she still thinks that's big fun!) and a new friend named Kaleigh. But this little clip, friends, was my favorite. This is from the "jumpy", as we call it, that was by the pavilion where we ate. Very funny.

Aren't we cruel?! ;-)

YEA!! It's finally done!

We here in Sugar Land, particularly north of 59, have been waiting and watching for a long time for this day to come. The much anticipated overpass of Hwy 6 over US90!! It is finished!

I moved out to Sugar Land about 10 or 11 years ago and lived way north on Hwy 6 near Bellaire. I was attending Sugar Creek Baptist at the time and therefore, had to cross the railroad tracks (grrr...) and the very busy and over-trafficked 90 way too often. Even then I was wishing, hoping for an overpass.
I now don't have to go over the tracks at that intersection very often but I do travel out 90 very often and I sit and wait along with the many others for my turn in one of the TWO lanes, to get through.

NO MORE!!

Last night we went out to eat with my in-laws and I'd been watching them putting what I thought to be "final touches" on the overpass thinking surely it would be open any day now. So I asked Reed to go home that way so that we could check on progress. Sure enough up and over we went, waving to the rushing traffic below! Yea!!!!

Now, truly, we are the best place to live, right? ;-)

Beware: Personal Conviction Ahead!

I know we see the pumpkins at the grocery store, I am soaking up every beautiful fall magazine with images of fall and I watch the weather with so much vain anticipation ("fall" in Houston...ha!). But here, in my heart, it's pruning season. God has been steadily talking to me lately about the good things He has given me that I have allowed to become ultimate things. Really just a euphemistic way to say "idol worship". I seem to revisit this idol often. And though my spirit would love to get rid of it once and for all, the thought of it pains my flesh. My ultimate thing, friends, is my home. I want my nice pink wingback chairs to be my nice, matching country french red plaid chairs. I want my peeling paint side table replaced by the beautiful carved wood nesting tables I found online. I want new curtains, new bookshelves, a remodeled "mud room" and and and...
The lie is that once I have _____________, I'll be happy. I'll be satisfied. I type this, I read it and I know it's a lie. But when Satan whispers it in my ear, I believe every word!
We recently visited Reed's grandmother in her retirement home. It is very nice. She has her own little apartment with a small kitchenette, sitting/TV area, little bedroom and bathroom. She can cook if she likes but there is a warm, inviting, all-the-work-is-done cafeteria right down the hall. It is a simple life she leads. She has pared down her belongings and her activities to what matters. Church, friends, family. All she wants for Christmas or her birthday is just to be around her grand and great grandkids to watch them laugh and play. It's hard to think of another thing in the world to get her. She has no need to shop. She is perfectly content.
We will all end up in a similar situation at some time. Why do I feel the need to accumulate, decorate, shop, fill up my calendar (and my daughter's), when these often have no Kingdom ground to be gained?
Of course this can be taken to extremes. I'm just saying that that's exactly what has happened in my heart. It has become an extreme. When it is quiet around me, my thoughts are not on heavenly things, but rather on my silly home. It's a great house! Full of wonderful, warm, happy things. Baskets, plenty of food, this amazing computer, warm beds, fluffy towels and more dishes than I could ever use in one meal! And yet, all of these things that I think I own, can, if not checked, begin to own me. So I'm choosing to refocus. With God's grace, lots of Bible reading, friends praying for me, and a little self-imposed "fasting", I am choosing to turn my heart's attention back where it is truly satisfied and complete. I am learning.
Philippians 3:8-9 I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ and be found in Him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ - the righteousness that comes from God and is by faith.

Missing Rich

His music career began in 1983 when Amy Grant recorded his song, "Sing Your Praise to the Lord".

He went on to create nine original albums.

In 1995, after the seventh album, he took off to go to an Indian Reservation in Arizona to teach music to children.

He always performed barefoot. That was his way.

He was greatly impacted by "The Ragamuffin Gospel" by Brennan Manning, and his band was "The Ragamuffin Band."

He had a simple faith, a simple life.

His passion and his calling from God was music. Creating it, singing it, teaching it, sharing it, all for His glory alone. I once heard that he was reluctant in the early days to record his own music because he had such a rough voice, but then felt that God's name would be praised and who was he not to be a part of that. So he sang.

He was so humble, such a servant and very uncomfortable in any kind of spotlight. I heard a story that he was at an awards dinner and after only being there a few minutes, he was spotted in a waiter's jacket serving dinner and drinks to all of the attendees.

He wasn't flashy, not all that good-looking. Wore everyday, unremarkable clothes, just to be covered and comfortable. He was natural.

He wrote an article for Release magazine for six years. They introduced his column like this: "He's a poet, a scholar, a gentleman, and yes, just a little bit off-center. But that's why we like him..."

He was very profound.

"The will of man will not ultimately prevail against the will of God. It is the will of God that we should know Him as He has revealed Himself and that will has not only survived the arrogant attacks of scientific and "enlightened" men, it has (even more miraculously) thrived in spite of our best intended, though sadly misguided, attempts at "rightly dividing" that seamless robe of revelation.

So let us press on with no faith in our own understanding and nothing but faithe in the Truth that is too great to be diminished by our feeble minds and too great to not transform us."

And here's another: "When we were kids we sang for the joy of singing, we colored and cut and pasted for the fun of doing it. We ran for the love of running and laughed and got scared and saw the world as a real place full of real dangers and real beauty and real rights and wrongs.

And if the cross is more than a symbol (and it is), and grace is more than sentiment (and, thank God, it is), if Jesus Christ is really God's revelation of Himself and not the product of human imagination (and He is), then we will become the children we once were and must become again. Stables will be temples, stars will be guarantees, 'the trees of the fields will clap their hands and the mountains and the hills will break forth in singing...' We will pray and run and work and give ourselves over to faith. And God will be our Father and His Kingdom will be our home, for we will be those children we once were, and 'of such is the Kingdom of Heaven'."

His songs moved me. They still do. "The stuff of Earth competes for the allegiance/I owe only to the Giver of all good things. So if I stand let me stand on the promise/ that You will pull me through/ and if I can't, let me fall on the grace/ that first brought me to You./ And if I sing let me sing for the joy/ that has born in me these songs./ and if I weep let it be as a man/ who is longing for his home." ("If I Stand" on Winds of Heaven, Stuff of Earth)

I had the opportunity to meet him once. He was so humble and unassuming. Some of my friends asked him to sign their tapes (yep, it was looooong ago, kids) and he signed each one simply, "Be His".

I admired him so much. His simplicity, his ease, his way of communicating. His way of highlighting the things in the world that point to Him. He was amazing, as were his songs. Truly inspired, I believe.

He died ten years ago on September 19. He was 41.

I heard the news and wept. There were four memorial services held in his honor. One in Nashville, one in Wichita (where he lived for many years), one on the reservation in Arizona, and one at Compassion International Headquarters. I had my own little memorial service, too.

The words to one of his later songs, "Elijah" still make me tear up. "When I leave I wanna go out like Elijah/ with the whirlwind to fuel my chariot of fire./ and when I look back on the stars/ well, it'll be like a candle light in Central Park./ and it won't break my heart/ to say goodbye."

I still miss him. I still listen to his music and delight to hear it on the radio (sometimes KSBJ playing ancient music is a good thing!).

I look forward to meeting him again.

P.S. I found a great little story about him here.

And this one is an absolute classic. Rich and his band doing "Screen Door" (a great song in it's own right) a capella using cups for rythym. Ya gotta see it!

Just a Quick Funny Story...

before I forget it...
So, tonight, MaryEvyn is eating her peas (one of the few veggies she'll still eat). All she had on was a diaper because she was waiting for her prized Dora pajamas to come out of the dryer. Since it wasn't an official 'family meal' and she was the only one eating, we had just dumped out and nuked half of a can of peas and she was eating that with her ravioli when somehow some of the juice from the peas sloshed out and onto her. This is what we hear:
"AHHHHHH - MommyDaddy - I spilled the pea water!!!!!! Get it OFF!!!! PEA WATER!!"
Very funny indeed. (Unless you're the one sloshed in pea water, I guess!)

Can Anyone Explain Houston Weather to Me?

Really, now. I have experienced a lot of things living in Houston all of my life. I have seen flags on a pole go from blowing like mad in one direction only to change and go the complete opposite direction all while sitting and eating lunch.
I have entered a building in short sleeves and departed a few hours later only to be met by freezing cold.
I have endured hurricanes...and I've fled from them, too (Rita, anyone?) I remember Alicia as one of the worst, by the way.
I do understand how our weather changes at the drop of a hat. But can anyone, anyone explain yesterday's "tropical storm"? I put it in quotes because I'm not convinced there ever was one!
I watched the news and listened to the weather yesterday at about 9am. Nothing. Then I get a call from a leader telling me there's a tropical storm that's headed for us that evening! So I turn on the news and sure enough, the telltale red, yellow and green swirls on the radar right off of Galveston. Schools are closing and Frank is telling us how it's going to dump all of this rain. Okay, okay, I think, I'll cancel student community group, for pete's sake!
Did we get a drop of rain? No. I even understood that it was supposed to linger for days: "Expect rain all day Thursday, Friday and Saturday..." I heard. I awoke this morning to a blue sky, a few puffy white clouds and not a hint of rain.
That was a first. How did a tropical storm hit only a few miles from my home, skid across Houston, even, and leave me dry? If anyone knows Frank personally, I'd like a word...
I'm not complaining, really, just befuddled. That's a new one in my book!

Reed comes home tomorrow, so do Phil and Cynthia - YEA!!
Have a great weekend, everyone!

Can a Three Year Old Learn to Serve?

So, my mom has this kind of "secret" ministry. It's something she chooses to do, simply on her own, to serve. She doesn't talk about it much because she enjoys doing it just for God, just for those she serves. Great idea and I'm so proud of her. She goes to a retirement home and helps the sweet little old ladies (and a couple of men) play Bingo. It's great - except those days when I ask her how it's going and one of those sweet ladies will be coming to Bingo no more. She has become their friend. If a regular doesn't show, she'll visit them. Many times they don't show because their health has taken a turn for the worse or they have lost a friend themselves. She has prayed with and for them, attended funerals, and even just stopped to visit a friend's relative (unbeknowst to them) because she heard that they were there. It's really beautiful.
Well, with Reed being gone this week, I usually visit my parents for one evening. Sometimes I spend the night. I've made a lot of plans for this week (to keep me busy while he's gone) so tonight was the only night I could make it, but that's her ministry night. Then it hit me. We could come along! They would LOVE it! Evy would LOVE it! My mom would LOVE it! I would LOVE getting to talk with them and share my little girl's sweet smile with them! Mom agreed it was a great idea, so we were off.
It was truly a fun time. The ladies were so sweet! Funny Wilma who says that she just can't seem to hold on to those little Bingo chips in her hands and so they fall all over the floor. She jokes that she should just play on the floor since that's where all her chips are! She was so glad to have Evy as her little picker upper! Sweet Jane with her long white hair falling around her shoulders who told me at least 15 times over the hour, "You sure do have a cute girl there!" Same words, same inflection. "Thank you," I said 15 times!
They have their own grandchildren and great-grandchildren but they live far away most of them, so they don't see them much at all. Evyn was more than happy to be their "stand in" for the night! She joyously covered her Bingo card with chips, crawled all over the chair, ate pink yogurt that a floor nurse gave her, picked up stray Bingo chips and said, "Thank you," to all their compliments over and over again!
It really was great!
It got me thinking. I would love to continue doing something like this. I mean, there's a retirement community just down the street from us. I love that she could learn to serve. Learn a respect and love for the elderly. Appreciate what they have to offer and not take her own great-grandmother for granted (which she doesn't, but, y'know...) So, I'm just wondering tonight what that could look like. I don't know if she could play Bingo for an hour every week, but surely there's something else. Taking pictures, artwork, maybe just visiting...I don't know.
Any ideas? Would you like to join in?

This Time It's For Real!

Well, like it or not, this is really it.

I know, I know...I already wrote about getting rid of her nummies. How she was big enough and I was confident that not only was she ready for it, but I was too. Well, then there was strep...and a host of other reasons. I think one of the big reasons was that we still actually posessed the nummies and she knew it. This time, there's no playin'. It's for real.

She was down to two nummies. One, the pink one with the butterfly, was her favorite. Only last week it finally succumbed to her little teeth and created a hole. We told her that that meant that it was now unsafe and she couldn't have that one anymore. We got rid of it and she never even complained about it. "Hmmm....," I thought.

Now today, we went to Brenham to see Steph and B and had a great time. We took all of the necessary napping acoutrements, of course. As we were leaving, I scooped them all up off the bed, into the bag and we were off. I pulled into a gas station in Katy because A. She was squealing about needing a potty (though when I actually pulled over, got out, and started to unbuckle her, realized she had already gone potty, apparently unbeknowst to her, I guess - very glad for that change of clothes I've been toting around in that silly bag for months thinking it was unnecessary!), B. I needed to go to the potty, and C. I needed gas in the car. We take care of all of the mentioned items and as we're taking off she begins asking for the nummy. I, as always, tell her it's only for naptime so she can't have it now. Even as the words are coming out of my mouth, I am beginning to wrack my brain to remember if I grabbed it. I searched her bags and things. Nope. I debated telling her now or later. Decision: get it over with. She seemed to take it okay, actually. "Hmmmm....," I thought again. "We'll see how tonight goes."

Here's another "Hmmm...": at school she sleeps perfectly fine without it...AND tonight we had to go straight to community group from Brenham and when I went to pick her up, all of the girls had been put to bed, including Evy...without the nummy!

So, here it is 10:30pm and I've barely heard a peep. She complained a little about it but we talked about it, I prayed for her and so far, so good. She has yet to shed a tear about it.
More of that bittersweetness. Yea...no more nummy! :-) Awww...no more nummy. :-( No more cute little sucking noises and the unmistakable way she talks with it in her mouth. Yet more of the baby gone. Can anyone tell me when I will get used to these steps?!!!

What "Lonely" Means These Days

Have you ever heard that little factoid about the Inuits (or someone like that) having, like, 50+ words for "snow"? Why? Because it is their life. It is such a part of every day and can be experienced and, therefore, described in so many ways. For me, personally, I have really no knowledge of snow, so snow is just snow.
Now, I'm a word person anyway. I like writing, I enjoy good, descriptive writing (like Catherine Newman down there in my link list - she's awesome!). I like the idea of being able to say what I mean succinctly because there are exact words for it. It irks me that we use the word "love" to describe so many truly different emotions. The love I have for pizza does not rival that of Vargo's chocolate mousse. And even that does not rival the love I have for my husband, and that is even different from the love I have for my little one. But this sorry little language of ours is lacking in this sense.
Another one: lonely.
As in, "My hubby is away and I am lonely." The typical response is, "Well, come on over!" "Let's have dinner." "Call me anytime!" While I really do appreciate these invitations for the sincerity and thoughtfulness with which they are delivered, they do not solve the problem of loneliness. Not this kind, anyway. It is not a lack of friends. It's not really boredom, either (though that comes into play at times). This loneliness is the result of my heart's soul mate being away. Not only is he not present, he is mostly unreachable. He is 7 hours ahead of us and that gives us maybe one uninterrupted, quality phone conversation per day. And usually either I am exhausted or he is.
He is my one. He knows me and shares my life with me. We are intertwined and interdependent (whether he says so or not!). He is the only one who knows our financial struggles and woes in actual amounts. He is the only one who revels in a good, funny Evy story like me because he is the only other one who loves her as I do. He is the one who "gets" my vision of student ministry. He is the one who gets me off of the couch and going to community group when I don't want to. He is the one who really knows why I don't want to go and gets that, too. He is the one I want by my side at school orientations, birthday parties, family dinners, and the first A & M game of the season. Because he gets it.
I want to tell him about the movie I saw, the fabric I love, the annoying thing Evy did, the beautiful way she suddenly whispered, "I love you, Mommy" in my ear today. Yes, I can still tell him these things, but he's not here to experience it with me. He's not here to kiss me, smile and say with his sweet brown eyes, "I know."
I know you know these things when you offer to have us for dinner, to stay at your house or to go out or to call. I know you know what it's like to be surrounded by people, friends even, yet still feel alone.
I miss my hubby.
And to think, God gave him to me as a shabby foreshadow and hint of the love He has for me and the soul mate that He is for my heart. This is my main reassurance that I am not alone. I have gone to sleep before with my Bible just to have a physical knowledge of His presence. I need Him even more than my hubby. I know this is one possible lesson in all of this travelling. That I would not become independent or fully capable without my hubby, but that I would become more dependent upon Him. That's my prayer.
I love you, Puppy, and I can't wait for this to be over. I am praying for you and longing for the day we are together again. Talk to you soon.

More Catching Up

Well, it's another year for my independent little girl. She's off to school and she loves it. Never looked back! She gives me a sweet kiss and hug and says genuinely, "Bye, Mama, I love you!" and skitters off to paint! (The painting is her favorite!)

We love her school, love her teachers. She's having a grand time and comes home with new wonderful favorites all the time!

Here's one for you Crossbridgers out there: we were recently at the intersection of 99 and 59 where the new Hermann Hospital is and there's that terrific Life Flight helicopter parked in perfect view. (We were on our way to Chick-fil-a, of course). So I point out the amazing aircraft to my astute daughter as she says, ever so excitedly, "Is it going to drop eggs!!!!"

Sweet toddlerhood!

Catching Up

Well, hello, Friends!
I know it's been a long, unannounced hiatus from Blogville for me. Let's reacquaint ourselves, shall we?
So...I actually started a while back with so many post ideas that I was overwhelmed. Then, I got stuck. Dry. Desert, really. Student ministry and a travelling hubby left me exhausted and stuck.
Then I got a project. I got the idea in my head to paint. Paint the family room, no less...the very nerve center of our home. I methodically started emptying the room of non-essentials (all but couch and tv) while hubby was gone, then sent Evy off to the grandparents Fri. night so I could A. have a girls' night with Steph, and B. begin prepping the room. When I started, I consulted a handyman magazine which advised painting in this order: trim, ceiling, walls. "What?!" thought I, who certainly knows more than this mere professional. "I just want a new color on my walls, not trim and certainly not the ceiling! That must be for new home buyers." So I began taping everything off. Steph and Casey arrived and dutifully picked up tape and rollers and brushes and dear Casey and Reed got that paint up faster than corn through a goose!
Soon, though, too soon, MaryEvyn was returned to us and it came to a screeching halt. I've been disappointed before in putting one too few coats of paint on a wall because I listened to others (probably the ones doing the painting, justifiably enough!). So, I really wanted another coat. So, my amazing hubby got another coat on there on Sunday. It looked great. But, wait, what's that? The trim looks awful! Really awful now. (It was only bad before, but NOW...) Enter sandpaper and trim paint thankfully left by former owners. So a very sore back and neck later, beautiful trim. All that was left was a little morning (now Tuesday, mind you) touch ups to fix the yellow on the ceiling and it's done.
Wait.
What's that?
There is clearly a defined line of new ceiling paint and old. Crap. (excuse me!)
So, we spent Tuesday night repainting the silly ceiling. Really, did I tell you my hubby is AH-MAY-ZING?!
Well, finally, my family room is back in working order. It's not the way I want it yet (will it ever be?). But I am in love with this color! The picture of course does not do it justice. A beautiful butter creamy yellow. With gorgeous ;-) white trim and ceiling!
Oh, and the lesson? Yes, the professional painter actually does know what he's talking about!!!

We Miss You, Daddy!

Okay, I know I haven't made a real post in a while, but things have been crazy over here at the our house and Reed's been out of town, so this one's for him!

Hi, Brad and Christy, I really wish I could've been there to see you two and say hi in person, but we have adventures here in Sugar Land that are calling. I would love to see pics of your not-so-little-anymore one! I hear you have more late night happiness coming your way! We are very happy for you! Hope to see you soon, though.

And here's our girl giving a message to her daddy:

Found a few gems!

Remember the blog about joy and sorrow over Evy's 3rd birthday? I added some pictures that I just found on those hidden recesses of our computer of my little newborn. If you're interested...

Just for Fun

I found this website a little while ago and I think it's so fun and I've never seen anything like it. Have fun creating!
www.jacksonpollock.org
Then if you want to know more about it, try visiting www.jacksonpollock.com.
Have a good day!

Two Are Better Than One - Part 2

I'm not sure that I said exactly what I wanted to say in my first comments on this. Allow me to further expound on this subject.
Our church lives and breathes by its community groups. Some call them small groups. We value genuine community at our church and this is where it comes closer to happening. I say "closer" because it still is lacking. It is a great first step, but generally you will find that it's not enough. You will want deeper study and you will want deeper friendships. I have been led to both of these through attending my community group. But it doesn't come without a fair amount of prayer and intentionality. What I referred to in my eariler post was "iron friends", my "accountability group" as some would refer to it. They are the ones who sharpen me as iron sharpens iron, like it says in Proverbs 27:17. I met Stephanie when I attended a community group led by Chuck, our pastor, specifically for newlyweds. Wow, that was about 4 or 5 years ago. Anyway, she was this funny, quirky, young redhead who attended most of the time without her husband who travelled, but I could tell she had a genuine relationship with God. It still took a while, but after several more meetings and other chances to talk, we became good friends, well on the way to being great friends. We quickly realized that we both had the same need: a friend who would tell it like it is, call sin sin, pray with and for me, encourage me, and grow with me. We started meeting weekly and I now can't imagine life without her. We soon included little Ms. Cynthia into our fold because, well, she had just married a good friend of ours and we knew enough about this focused girl to know that she needed the same thing.

I tell this story mainly to tell how I got to this great place of having such wonderful friends who help me grow. But please note, they do not create the growth, nor are they the reason for the growth, they simply help me see areas and situations where I have not applied the saving work of God to my life.

What easily happens is that we get off track from our purpose. We found ourselves getting together with the best of intentions but we would drink our coffee, talk about the circumstances in our lives, our calendars, our husbands, children, whatever, but never get to what God was doing. What was He teaching us? How was He transforming us? There was still some encouragement happening, but not the real stuff. What was our heart chasing after?

We have since recognized this, apologized for it and are making a return to the real questions and honest answers. It is a blessing to have these kinds of friends and, again, I pray that you will find them, too.

Big Youth Event Moved Due To Erin

Okay, so we had a big, anticipated Crossbridge youth event planned for tonight...outside. A movie, entertainment, banana splits...the works. I just want you to know, friends, that this big, much anticipated event that has been talked about word of mouth, now must be moved!
Rain.
Not just rain...a tropical storm!
The best part...it's name is Erin.
Yup.

Two Are Better Than One

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12
Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work:
If one falls down,
his friend can help him up.
But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!
Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
But how can one keep warm alone?
Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

I use the book, Search the Scriptures, very often in my personal Bible study times and one of the questions for this passage asked: "What are the blessings of friendship described [here]? How does this apply in the spiritual life?" Great questions and the more I have thought about it and heard it preached, I may just be beginning to really believe it. Here's a few thoughts I've had.
We're not made to be alone. God is not and was not ever alone. We're made in His image, therefore, we are not made to be alone. When I work with my friends, more gets done. There were a million things going on this Sunday at church between meeting new students, passing out fliers, activities with elementary kids, and taking care of items needed for an event this weekend...I never could've done it all. Thank goodness for my leadership team. They were awesome. The students helped pass out fliers and talk to new students, Kristin has a party for our graduating seniors ready to go, Chris took care of packing up stuff for our event and I handled the elementary gym (with my totally unpredictable jr. highers!). When I work with my friends, our vision is bigger, our creativity sparks, my perspective is enlarged. Not only that, but when I share my work with others, I am not the only one who benefits from seeing God move...they do, too! God gets even more glory and more work gets done!
I need my friends because when I screw up and fall down off the right path, I can tell them and they help me make it right and pick me up. They can tell me when I have screwed up (if I am blissfully unaware). They can tell me, "Hey, um, Erin, that doesn't seem right. Are you sure that was showing the love of Christ there?" "Let's talk about whether or not that is truly the best use of your resources." That's what my true friends do.
They also help me stay warm in the encouraging light of pressing on towards the goal set before me. It can pretty cold out there in my world. Fighting a constantly nagging toddler, a husband whose control I desire (ooh, ugly!), pride, female porn (that's Pottery Barn, for those of you who don't know), bored students....the list continues. But when I am with my "iron friends", I am surrounded by the greater glow of the flame of God's Kingdom. I am reminded of what's better. I am encouraged to continue the fight and I hear God's call on my life louder and the din of my circumstances becomes quieter. But without my friends, the righteous path can get awfully dim and I lose my way ever so much easier.
Finally, I have a defense against the attacks of the Enemy. When I need to, I pick up the phone and call them and they pray. We are there for each other and now, Satan must defeat us both, which is not so easy. We know each other's weaknesses and are there to stand in when needed. I am not alone.
Not only that but that third strand, that ultimate Stronghold and Fortress, is standing firm around us, too. How now can I fall?
So, props to my girls. My friends who know me and call me and ask me and pray for me and allow me to pray for them. My friends who are real, honest, and straight. Who love me enough to tell me what they really see.
Share your life with someone. They'll share with you. And the cord of three strands will not be quickly broken.

The party results are in - crazy, but wonderful!

Well, the tags have been cut, toys have found a home, dishes washed, floor scrubbed (let's hear it for tile floors!!), trash is out (lots of it!). We had a fantastic time! More importantly, Evy had a fantastic time! She was so excited to see all of her friends and, especially, Ms. Phyllis! She had to be the one to open the door for Ms. Phyllis! She orchestrated a wonderful little "band" of rythym sticks, then egg shakers and scarves that danced high and low. We sang and danced and there were squeals of laughter and delight!

Evy's grandmother, Reed's mom, made an absolutely adorable outfit for MaryEvyn, all out of material she had on hand. My outfit, believe it or not, was comprised of items I had already in my closet. One mom proclaimed as she came in, "Look! It's Dora's mom!" Reed found a Mexican wedding shirt at the last minute! It was great.

We served homemade quesadillas with chicken Reed had grilled, and plain cheese for the kids, fruit, and plenty to drink. We had cupcakes iced in red, white, and green for the Mexican flag. Then we opened gifts and thanked all our friends and finally went outside to beat up a pinata (Thank you, Morgan, for the donation!!). Difficult to say what may have been Evyn's favorite part...between Ms. Phyllis, gifts, cupcakes and the pinata! From her perspective, it was a homerun! From my perspective, she was shown love.

A Third Birthday - Sorrow and Joy

Birthdays are so different when you are the celebrated one's mother. So many delights, concerns, and, yes, a little sorrow.
The concerns: is it too much? did we invite too many people? did I go overboard on the gifts? on the party? can she handle all of these gifts and still be grateful, appreciative? how much is too much? how do I make everyone happy? does she know how very loved and special she is?
The delights: blue eyes wide with surprise and joy as she opens a pink guitar she asked for, pink lips from licking wonderful icing off of a cupcake, blowing out her candles without being told what to do, the "thank you" hugs she gives, the next day as she plays with her new toys and is still saying, "thank you so much for my _____, Mommy!", her little fingers proudly displaying her new age
The sorrow: I sat down with Evy yesterday (her actual birthday) and showed her pictures of when Mommy was pregnant with her and then the day she was born and other baby pictures. While she understands that that is somehow a picture of her, I don't think she relates to it well. I mean, who can remember being a baby. There is the one of me in a hideous denim shortall (what was I thinking!!) with a huge belly. Several of me in the hospital before she was born (it was a long day, and she was born that night). Her first picture ever as they held her up, just as the dr. extracted her from me (she was a C-section) and pronounced to our anxious ears, "It's a girl!" The picture of the first time after that that I saw her was as they wheeled me back to my room past the nursery where they were washing her already thick, dark hair. Then the first one of the three of us as a family - for that's when you really feel like a family. We had to get the nurse to take it, because all of our family had left (and I hadn't even held her yet!). But my all time favorite is the one of her first nursing. Her little chubby fingers are all curled up and her sweet face looks just like an angel. Her eyes are closed and she looks so cozy and just made to be right there. It brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it. My baby. I miss those days. She is such a big, bright, beautiful, intelligent, articulate little girl now and I love that, but, oh, to have a little snuggling baby's sweet breath on your neck, playing absently with your hair, cuddling on your lap. Nothing beats it. And I want it again something awful. Never thought I'd say that.
It's going so fast and as much as I try to slow every day down, it just keeps going on without a thought to how fleeting that sweet breath is, and how cute her little voice sounds, and how funny her little phrases are.
But to every thing there is a season. As I've been reading Ecclesiastes, God has been lovingly coaching me on how to enjoy my sweet girl and not to take the responsibility He's given me in raising her lightly. How to leave the times up to Him, He knows. He will make "everything beautiful in its time." "I know that everything God does will endure forever; nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it. God does it so that men will revere him."
So, maybe we're pregnant this month, maybe not, but God knows and I like it that way. I rejoice in His way. Even as time marches on.

Evy's party

Okay, so I have a partial victory! I was able to embed the video below but not able to include text with it. Grrr....

Anyway, that's my family singing to Evy for her birthday. Peyton is the oldest, holding MaryEvyn. She starts middle school this year and none of us can believe it! Then there's Kyle next to her, and Bailey sitting in Kelley's lap. Kevin, my brother, is in the foreground and I just noticed that you can see Reed, my dad taking pictures and even me in the mirror over Evy's head. Cool, eh?
Anyway, it was a great "cake" that Mom made out of a grouping of various flavors/colors of icing to make a butterfly. Evy loved it!!

This is Evy displaying her new "butterfly" wings and her wand. She doesn't want to take them off!


And this is the big hit - a pink guitar! Yes, she's a rock star/butterfly/fairy! She loves it!
Happy Birthday, Sweet Girl!

Evy's 3rd Birthday Party #1 - Family

A Day at the Beach!

We spent this Saturday at Galveston. I took a bunch of students from Crossbridge with some leaders to a great little pocket park and it was great! Though it rained in the city, we saw very few little clouds and it was sunny all day! The waves were very gentle which was perfect for Evy's first trip in the ocean. She wore a little life jacket but didn't like to go too far. She loved building a sand castle and put shells on top for "flags". She also loved playing with a beach ball in the shallow water and throwing it to all of her "friends" (Kris, Priscilla, Joe, Daddy, anyone else who would catch it!). She let me pull her on a boogie board in the shallows, too.

We ate lunch on the deck and then arrived down on the beach. The guys were starting a game of ultimate frisbee (I think that's what they're playing) and Reed joined in. He was not the same after that. We thought he just needed to rest and drink some water which is what he did. But then he said that just the water was making him nauseous. He thought he was going to lose it many times that day (probably wished he could), but didn't. He was able to manage getting in the water a few times and to play with Evy. It wasn't until we got home that we realized he very well could have had heat exhaustion. Bad call on the ultimate game... oh, well. He's fine now!

Anyway, after little cold showers to rinse off, we headed to LaKing's on the Strand for some old-fashioned candy and ice cream goodness. Fantastic. If you've never been, I consider it a must for every G-town trip. There was a man making taffy and he would throw some out in the crowd. Everyone got one and MaryEvyn was delighted! The ice cream was the perfect end. Evy actually tasted a few and ended up choosing French Vanilla, isn't that funny? She ate every bite.

We got home about 6:30 (Reed finally made it home by about 7:15). Super fun day (well, if you weren't Reed, that is!). ;-) Good memories!

Tag: 10 Random Things You May Not Know

I've been tagged by Mel, a wonderful mom-friend from Crossbridge, to give 10 random things you may not know. So, here you go. Let me know what surprised you, okay?

1. This is what I'm wearing right now (and some variation every morning). Pajama pants and an old (2001) camp t-shirt and fuzzy slippers (my feet are always cold)

2. Yes, about my feet and cold. I'm almost NEVER barefoot for many reasons. I have sensitive feet probably because I'm never barefoot but I think it also makes my feet pretty and soft. Besides, I hate getting little pieces of dirt or crumbs or whatever stuck to bare feet - drives me crazy. I'm almost always cold (unless I'm outside) so I just like having things on my feet. There.

3. I have a tattoo. I took a somewhat embarassing picture of it for you. It is on the center of my lower back. I was 26 and it mortified my mother. I just really like stars, especially this one. It was supposed to be a little smaller, but I still like it. No, I don't regret it.

4. I really don't like to cook. I hate making dinner. Though I do love the satisfied, fulfilled feeling of setting a great, homemade, healthy meal on the table for my family to sit and eat. But I hate making it. Don't get me wrong, I still do it because I/we highly value that family time and I think it helps us maintain healthier eating habits, but I hate doing it. Love baking sweets: pies, cupcakes, cakes, cookies, pudding...

5. I like to sew. I finally sat down on Sunday and finished several projects. It was great. I fixed the straps on a cute floral backpack I used to use as Evy's diaper bag. I sewed up a hole in one of her shorts and I finished a sweet little curtain for Steph's new bathroom. That was very satisfying and I can't wait to see it all hung! Next: pillows!

6. I'm a Francophile. I just learned that that is the term for my admiration and desire for all things French. Holly got me a learn to speak French CD/book combo and I want to learn some of the phrases and words and pronunciation. I LOVE country French decorating and am moving my home in that direction. Love the warm yellow, mellow, soft woods. Love red and blue and all of the fabric crafts that come with country French. That's all on that.

7. I'm not a gardener at all. I can't grow a single thing. I have tried and cannot even get an ivy to cooperate. I have just about completely lost some Mexican heather that was in our yard in a few spots that was reportedly, "impervious". So much for that. Apparently, watering is still a necessity. Oh, right, watering... I'd love to grow some herbs, and I have great ambitions for an azalea bush in our back yard. We'll see.

8. Before VeggieTales Cd's invaded my car, I used to love to listen to Metallica's black album, the Gypsy Kings, Matchbox 20, and FooFighters to name a few. If I'm alone in the car and one of these comes on the radio I turn it up VERY loudly and have my own little concert. Back in the day I was a serious Duranie. (If you don't know what that is, just ask a child of the 80's)

9. Y'know Monica on Friends? We are one. Remember the episode where they teased her about having to eat cookies over the sink (so the crumbs don't go all over the floor?) - totally what I do (and love it when others do, too). I clean constantly, especially the floor (see #2 about bare feet). The only thing I don't enjoy cleaning is the tub and toilet. I do like laundry, actually. Not that it's a favorite pastime, but I don't dread it. My best friends are my floormate and dustbuster. I've been known to follow after Reed with it...

10. Ummm...I don't know how to dive. Like into a pool. I'm a terrible swimmer.

That's all.

Strep changes things, right?

Okay, so, now I've taken Evy to the Dr. because when I told them she'd had a fever off and on since Friday, they said, "Bring her in." So I do and she checks her out - sees nothing unusual. Then I point out a very subtle, only a mommy would notice, kind of rash that she's had on her tummy and cheek. "Oh," Dr. says. "Well, that could be strep. I'll have my nurse come give her a test." So the test comes back positive and our little girl has, unbeknownst to any of us, been battling strep for about 4 days. Oh, the people she has exposed over the weekend!! To all of you, I'm sorry!
She had a terrible battle with Reed tonight trying to give her her medicine. For whatever totally rational toddler reason, she refused to take it and when I came home from the grocery store Reed is at the end of his rope with her and she's crying inconsolably in the family room. Oh, dear. I try to calm her and find out why she won't take it, but it's a definite no go. Reed calls the pharmacist who recommends putting it in applesauce or pudding. Hmm...unlikely that will entice her. However, I did just come home with some MUCH anticipated Dora yogurt from Yoplait. We try it. She likes it. Though we're not at all sure about putting an antibiotic in yogurt of all things! I'll call the pharmacist again tomorrow on that one. But for tonight, the battle is over and she's asleep. The poor, tired, emotional roller-coaster is asleep.
So, now, maybe that changes my stand a bit. Maybe she needs the nummy a little longer? Now I'm feeling a little guilty about what I've put my child through the last few days, when all the while she's been sick. She's just not herself (think PMS-ing toddler - one minute laughing hysterically, then crying with an equal amount of fervor and you have no idea why).
Ah, well, at least she should be over it by the time her party rolls around. Poor baby. Pray for her rest and our patience! Thank Him for antibiotics! ;-)

More Toddler Woes: Giving Up Nummy

For the past several nights, MaryEvyn has been waking up at, well, inconvenient hours. 12:30am, 2am, 5am...she stumbles into our room, usually goes to Reed's side of the bed, and woefully announces that she cannot find her nummy. My sweet, patient husband replies in one of two ways, "Go look under your pillow", or "Go back to bed!"...sometimes both. Every now and then he'll go help her find it. Why don't I do it, you ask? Because I have apparently gained the ability typically touted by newborns' daddies of not hearing/registering a thing. I just don't hear her. If I do, it is too late and Reed has already responded to her. I'm not exactly sure if losing her nummy is what is waking her or if it's something else and she then realizes she doesn't have it within reach. Whatever the cause, enough is enough.

She has been in a whining and foul mood, eats hardly anything, and cries about everything because she's so tired. This morning (after coming into our room at least 3 or 4 times last night), she came into my bed at the normal time (about 7) and told me she wanted breakfast. But she promptly fell asleep right next to me, which NEVER happens. So I let her sleep. She didn't wake until 8:30. So, it's time.

I have given her all of the reasons and done everything that I rationally can to help her understand that it's time. The nummy has to go. Here are my thoughts:

1. The nummy could be the reason she's waking up, so that is reason #1, and I've told her that.

2. It could possibly begin to mess up her teeth. I've heard conflicting reports on this, but it's enough to make me wonder and use this as reason #2, also given to Evy.

3. She is going to be 3 in just a few days and is a big girl, so it's time.

4. I just can't bring myself to intentionally lie to those big, beautiful, trusting blue eyes. So I won't tell her we're giving it to some poor child in Africa who doesn't have one, or to Santa, or the Nummy Fairy. I just can't do it. She's just going to have to be a big girl and give it up.

So, there's a fair amount of crying and gnashing of teeth over here today. As I write this, she is begging alternately for her nummy and for me to not spank her. (The spanking is for getting up and out of her room at naptime - not for the nummy. I've so far only had to do it once.) Now she's reading in her room quietly. We'll see how this goes.

Thing is, there's kind of no turning back now. I mean, if I give in after any and all of this, it will only be worse. So, now that it's started and the crying is real, there's no way I'm going to go through this for nothing. We have to be strong and do this!

Bye, bye, Nummy!

Up and Down-y Kind of Day

Have you had one of these. Happily, the day started on the up! Here it goes:

Fortunately, I got up early and got my shower out of the way, so I had a good start. Took Evy over to a friend's house to play, go to the library and lunch and nap with which gave me several gorgeous hours to get other things done. Some important things, some not so important.

Fortunately, I easily found the first of the party items needed for the big Musical Fiesta. Got the tambourines for the invites and they're perfect! And just the right number, too! Then I took my content little self over to DSW. Found two wonderful pairs of cute, comfy shoes for cheapo and got to use my $10 coupon for their rewards card. Cool.

UNfortunately, as I was driving to my next destination, Hobby Lobby, I had that horrible feeling which only grew stronger. The I-just-started-didn't-I feeling. So, we're not pregnant this month either. It's been, well, a long time, friends. I won't even tell you how long. At first, I tried to not dwell on it, just wanted to continue my day. A little sadder, but I pressed on.

Fortunately, I found a cute, comfy knit outfit perfect for Evy in the fall for $16 at the Knit Capital, Old Navy, before I made my way to HL where I found the perfect background paper in their scrapbooking area. I also found coordinating ribbon.

UNfortunately, then my best friend, Holly, called to say goodbye. She's leaving yet again to return to the Land of the Unfriendly, London. (Don't know why every location has a nickname today....?) Again, quite sad. She seems so torn between her worlds and just a little bit unsure of what's next for her. Her family situation these days is hard and it is bittersweet to leave them, too, let alone me!

I allowed this to spin me into a little, mini pity-fest. Why can't we have another kiddo? I'm not sure what the hold up is. Every month we cheerily try and try again but to no avail. I anxiously wait, but then the feeling comes again. But then, why do we choose to only wait as long as WE want to. Then when we feel it's been too long, we begin wondering what's wrong. We begin to become more upset, more dissatisfied and then the grumbling begins. So God and I had a talk. No, I didn't bargain with Him (though I wanted to) but I did apologize for wanting to get ahead of Him. In the end, He let me just be a little sad for a while, but still with the hope that He had greater things in store for our little fam. James 5:7-12

Fortunately, I came home, ate some of my favorite comfort food (sonic cheeseburger, tots and a vanilla Coke) and got to work on the invites. They came out GREAT!! I love them and am so pleased with the result. Tell me what you think:

The rest of the day was fine, I guess, although still tinged a little sad. But, Fortunately, I went to sleep cuddled up with my honey and all is well. I am better than I deserve. Yes, Lord, better than I deserve.

Inspiration!!! It came on a lazy Saturday

Apparently just to prove that I really do operate better on full sleep (which for me seems to be about 8 hours), I awoke this morning and finally found the inspiration for Evyn's 3rd birthday party! I'm soooooooooooooo jazzed! And, not to sound incredibly cheesy, but I'm finding myself thankful for God's gift of creativity! (But I could write a whole other blog about that!)
First of all, this is Reed's birthday weekend (Happy Birthday, Love o' my Life!) and we shipped Evy off to her grandparents in LJ so that we could enjoy 1. a dinner birthday party with a few friends last night, and 2. a lazy Saturday morning, getting up whenever we please! Thank you, Jim and Harriet, for we have thoroughly enjoyed both!
When I got up this morning I came and got on the internet (my favorite thing to do lately) and after checking all of my favorite blogs (I need to update my list over there on the side), I went to Oriental Trading Co. to see if I could find anything for Evy's party. I have already arranged to have her Kindermusik teacher, Ms. Phyllis, come and do her thing (as she does it sooo wonderfully well!), but had no other real direction. I looked yesterday at my 2 favorite party/invite stores but saw nothing. However, the ever Astounding owner of Paper Suitcase (I don't remember her name) just threw out this idea she had for invitations on a little tambourine. I mean, how clever is this girl!! I love her!! But at the time I thought, "Hmm...great idea, but, how?"


Well, kids, I was looking online and found these:

PERFECT!! Then I was curious to see if they had any other instrument type goodies and found these:
Cute, little kids size maracas. Then, I saw that they were labeled under "Fiesta" and that's when it hit me!! A Musical Fiesta - that's our theme for Evy's party. The super cool part is that it incorporates most of Evy's obsessions these days because I can now include a pinata and throw in a little Dora the Explorer! Now if I could just work in princesses......?! Just kidding! I'm so excited and know that this is going to be so much fun. She's so much more aware this year and I'm really looking forward to her surprise and excitement!

Oh, and I also found these:

Adorable kid-sized sombreros!

And these:

Yes, those are cute little rubber duckies wearing sombreros and mexican blankets or maracas!! How cute is that?

So, those are going to be a part of the goody bags. Who can resist. All courtesy of Oriental Trading Co., of course! Can't wait for the Musical Fiesta for my sweet little three year old!!

Taking the Plunge

For the past two weeks Evyn has been learning about water. I've been learning about how to encourage, comfort, and teach my independent, stubborn little girl! (Not to mention patience and a sense of humor!) Here's the deal - we started out like this: She has no problem with this small pool that comes up to her ankles. No challenge and she plunges in with not a hint of hesitation. She was playing with her cousin in his backyard and both of them did this for hours!

But today she did this:
Do you see the death grip she has on my neck? And that open mouth is producing a scream the whole block can hear. Deafening, really. I'm calmly whispering in her ear, telling her I'm not going to let her go, I'm not going to make her do anything she doesn't want to (mostly) and that there's no reason to be afraid. I am trying to make her smile and forget her fear...anything to stop the screaming! All it takes for this response to begin is to suggest something she doesn't want to do.

Her fear lies in the bigness of what she calls "the big pool". She is not comfortable. She has to hold on to me, or she'll go down. She is challenged and knows that I am going to ask her to do something she's not sure about doing. Although she loves me and knows that I will not ask her to do what I know she can't do...she still struggles to trust me when it comes to physically doing it.

But then she does something wonderfully easily, just like this:

Today all she really needed to do was sit on the edge (as Ally is dutifully demonstrating) and sort of fall in. But, no, my Evy, ever the surprise, is anxious to stand and just jump in. What? She won't hold her breath, won't willingly dunk her head, won't let go of my neck is all of sudden ready to jump into the "big pool" she is so afraid of...into my arms. Unbelievable!

At any rate, she now loves to blow bubbles (thanks to a stroke of genius involving the use of a straw) underwater, but protests loudly (i.e. screaming) for any other feat. She loves her teacher, Ms. Sandy, who is indeed wonderful. Loves the idea of the water. Loves the idea of being able to swim. But the scary steps along the way are proving very difficult.

What I can't help thinking is "How different am I?" Yes, Father, I see that the water where You are is refreshing and cool and clear, but, it looks pretty scary and I'd have to depend on You for my support the whole time. I'll just stay here in my little pool where I know just what to expect and, well, it's comfortable (for my feet, anyway) and it sure is convenient because it's on my terms.

The "big pool" could be a lot of different things. What is God calling you to that scares the pants off you - that makes you want to scream loud enough for the block to hear? Perhaps it's to trust Him in a new ministry, plugging in to a community group, joining a church, tithe ten percent (before taxes!), stepping out to meet someone new... the list goes on.

Just keep this picture of Evy in your mind and jump in. Your capable Father knows exactly what He's doing and what you're doing (and capable of doing), and how great it will be when you listen to Him. He's whispering calm, encouraging things in your ear and knows how joyful you'll be and how glorified He'll be when you do.

Just Walk Across the Room

So, maybe you've noted that I'm reading Bill Hybels book Just Walk Across the Room. It is one of the many books that my pastor, Chuck Land, has recommended. It's very good and quite inspiring and encouraging. I started it on my own and am now going back through it a bit more thoroughly with Morgan. I'm looking forward to being able to discuss it with someone.
How quickly and easily my heart grows cold towards those outside of God's family. Morgan and I were talking about how we tend to play down God's wrath and forget about the reality of hell and eternal separation. How very close each and every one of us is to eternity and how very short our time here is. We forget how bad off our loved ones are without God, how hopeless it is. I'm not the most openly compassionate sort of person and I tend to often think that my non-Christian friends have simply decided that they're life is just fine and that they don't need God, so my haughty little self says, "Well, if that's the decision they've made, then they must be willing to live with the consequences." It doesn't occur to me sometimes that it is an uninformed, deceived "decision" that they have made.
As I've read this book, I have uncovered this erroneous thinking and am praying for God to soften my heart to those not following Him. To show me opportunities to be guided by His Spirit to open their minds and hearts to His love and adventure. To give me eyes to see those disengaged from God and others across the room, leave my "circle of comfort", and welcome them to my life and learn about theirs. I mean, that's where the adventure is, right? A new relationship, a new friend full of personality and stories and hurt that I, through God, have the secret of fulfilling. That's exciting!
Check out this book (only not at the library, because I've already done that!). It's not a "how-dare-you-ignore-God's-mission" type of book - it's very encouraging and gives lots of practical things to do to prepare our minds for the task. The harvest is ready.

CSM: On the Verge

It's too late at night, past our bedtime and Reed and I are up and talking. What is it that would cause this? One of two things: his passion - leading groups, or mine - student ministry. It's such a buzz for me, like caffeine. Once I get started thinking, dreaming and praying about it, I just can't stop. I've learned not to read my youth books or start talking about it too close to bedtime. I've learned that worrying about what kids are attending, who's not and why or what the leaders are (or aren't) doing does nothing, but praying about it and trusting God's hand does. That's one of the coolest things about ministry...God does the hard work, we just follow.
So, if I'm not worrying about those things, what gets me all jazzed? Glad you asked.
I just love this amazing vision I have of 50 (I don't know why this number...but that's what always pops in my mind) kids all at different stages with their Maker sitting around being ministered to by one another, adult leaders and me. Maybe that's in community groups, an event, camp, a retreat, a service project, maybe even a Sunday morning of all students! I can just see it! And to think that God can bring us these ragtag students from all over Fort Bend (and beyond) so that we can share with them how awesome life is when it's lived in God's love and adventure...well, the thought gets me stoked. I dream of students making that happen because they get it. Students who are filled not by entertaining programs but the knowledge of who they are in Christ and that gives them freedom and confidence. And because they are filled they can share it with others...in fact, they can't wait to! I see homes filled with students sitting around a living room, tummies full of hot dogs and pizza, Bibles open, faces introspective considering the discussion and how to apply scripture to their daily life. I hear prayer requests for softer hearts because they are convicted of being hard towards others and God. I see groups of kids standing around greeting and talking and connecting with one another on a Sunday morning, then sitting down and worshipping together with the larger church body (and there is no mistaking that they're there!).
Then here's what really gets me: we're on the verge.
"Um...really, Erin, cuz, I saw about 10 kids this past Sunday."
Yeah, but it's God's ministry and He could do whatever he sees fit. Especially once we get ahold of the idea that the ministry doesn't exist for us, but for them. Others. And I think that's beginning to happen. That's what excites me. Does that make me a ministry nerd? Unrealistically idealistic? Maybe. But I don't care. I'll keep listening to Jesus and His words to encourage me, because I know it's His song, I just get to sing it! And it's a beauty!

Raining on Our Parade

Fourth of July. We were supposed to have a parade in our neighborhood and Evy and I had made this fun little firecracker hat and little star "wands". We had even borrowed a wagon to decorate and walk her in. But, as you can see, it rained on our parade! It started raining at about 8:00 this morning and hasn't quit.
But that's okay, 'cause this sad face didn't last long when we told her we were going to go to Mamaw and Pawpaw's after her nap! There is still fun to be had!

Discovered Etsy today!

I have seen links and references to Etsy, and have seen some remarkably creative things there today. Here are a few that I loved...

This one is my favorite!

So sweet!!

And how cute is this one?!

I would LOVE to see these in my yelloware bowl on my kitchen table!!

Anything with sweet little birds makes me happy these days!

Again with the sweet birds. There's a full set of these. Cute for a nursery, right?!

I just might be addicted. I just think it's incredible to see these beautiful things handmade by such creative people! And they're mostly very inexpensive and reasonable. Not only that but you have a one-of-a-kind piece of art!

What a terrific celebration of the creative mind of God that we get a piece of. What inspiration these things bring me!

Have an inspired, creative day, everyone!

Holly's Home * O Happy Day!*

My sweet Holly is home, y'all! I just love this girl.
We met if not the first day, it had to have been the first week that I loaded up my stuff in my little Honda Civic hatchback and unpacked it in my dorm room. Me, the wide eyed freshman ready for anything (mostly just a good time) while she was the thoughtful, studious sophomore.
Before school started that year I had gotten a job at a Christian book store and had made a few friends. One of them, the owner's son who was a sophomore at HBU(and was to become my boyfriend), was a good friend of Holly's and he had told me I needed to meet her. So, I really think it was my first day there at the dorm and I wandered down, a little shyly to meet this "Holly" girl. She had a roomate named Sotheary and I knew pretty quickly that we were going to be friends for a long time. I mean, who isn't immediately taken by her generosity, sincerity and compassion?
After my freshman year, Holly, Sotheary and I moved into an apartment across the street from the university. We loved it. It was actually a pretty big apt. that we got for a song. Holls and So shared a room while I had one to myself. I have so many great memories from that time. She was a great influence and encouragement for me during a time when all I was really looking to do was just enough schoolwork to maintain my scholarship and play the rest of the time. Holly was pretty much the opposite. She needed me and Sotheary to remind her of the fun we were also there to have. Oh, and that musty old couch and chair. I'm not sure what that smell was!
Anyway, eventually, Holly graduated a year before me, moved to an apartment on her own and started to teach while I finished my last year living at my parents'. (Yes, it was hard to go back.) Then when I graduated I moved in with her and, man, did we need each other. Those first teaching years are really tough.
Holly's seen me through a lot. More than a few boyfriends and broken hearts, frutsration with students and an administrator, running from God to do what I want, a tattoo, my cleaning obsession, and, oh, the horrible barbecue/white shirt incident which I won't even tell here. And eventually, was instrumental in Reed's proposal plan and happily, though with understandable fear of losing her best friend, stood right beside me as I pledged forever to love my Reed. We've logged countless hours on staircases, couches and on the phone just talking, crying and encouraging (and we're still adding those up!). Then I was there loading her on the plane to London unable to let her go until I had to at the airport nine months pregnant, knowing this, even a ten hour plane ride, would not deter our friendship. And it hasn't.
It's no accident she is my best friend and I look forward to the many more events that we will share together, good and bad. I hope you have a friend like my Holly, and if you do, call her and tell her ya love her! Aren't girlfriends the best?!